I just read this fabulous piece by Wendy Harmer. Those of you who have read my book The Happy Endings Book Club will know how I feel about aging, and embracing that process. One of the seven stories in the book is about Tilda, who has “invisibility”, a condition common in women over 45-years. Tilda goes on a journey, both internally and geographically, to beat this insidious disease.
This Madonna commercial triggered Wendy Harmer’s hilarious but oh so spot on piece. Be warned… it has offensive content. It has a fifty something year old women writhing around pretending to be twenty and selling the idea that that is how we all should be. For some reason the clip isn’t inserting… so…
I just turned 45. I’m not overly comfortable with the aging process, but I’m getting there. Getting work done for me means working on embracing ageing, not erasing it. I have been the maiden. I am the mother… I will move into the crone with grace.
Just yesterday I was in my car waiting for a woman to cross the road. This woman has a very severe eating disorder. I’ve seen this woman around a lot, and always feel for the journey she’s on. But in that moment, as I watched her yesterday, I looked down at my own body and felt so much love for it. It was one of those profound moments where you feel connected to everything, yourself especially. Love.
I do love my body. It has been good to me. It had its moment of glory… which of course I didn’t appreciate at the time. (Youth is wasted on the young.) I can see it ageing, losing that youth, but gaining other things in it’s place. I’m more aware of the workings of my body, my mind, my spirit now. I sense issues as they come up. I’m more comfortable. I spend a lot of time naked, wandering the house, hanging out (literally) with my guy. I’m more sexually free and aware than I’ve ever been.
Every time I see a woman like Madonna, I think “You must really hate getting older.” And what a waste of time to feel that way. We spend more of our lives being older than being young, so why deny it? Why not embrace it? It comes with so much knowledge, including the knowledge that you don’t know much at all. There’s freedom in that.
The only issue I have with Wendy Harmer’s blog is the title: “Hey Over 45 Year-Olds: Grow Up!”
I’d prefer to “grow in.” Into my aging skin. Into my aging body. Into my hard earned wisdom. Into me, each and every day.
I’m growing into myself. Are you?